Eulogy
I would like to first thank you all for coming. It means a lot to us as a family to have people that Vito loved and that loved him around us.
So here we are. All gathered together to mark the end of a VERY long journey of a man we knew and loved..
When asked by his son what it takes to be a man, Rudiard Kippling once wrote
“If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With 60 seconds worth of distance run.
Than yours is the earth and all that is in it
And what is more you will be a man, my son”
Well if that’s the stuff that men are made of, then I can certainly say that my dad made one hell of a run out of that unforgiving minute.
Many of you here know my dad’s past. ..
Here is a man born here in this country only to be uprooted and moved to Italy before he was even a teenager. There, through hard work he earned a full law degree, Then through the course of history ended up being a POW in occupied Italy for over 2 years. I can’t even imagine what that must have been like.
When that was over he made his way back to the states, a virtual stranger there, after all of those years, and what did he do?
Started law school all over again here. Only THIS time he did it with a Wife, a child (my sister Lorraine) and a full time job. Geez…That alone is something. I joke with my sister sometimes that if I go to the bank and the cleaners on a workday, I’m, like, “WHEW! What a day!”
Through the years, through ups and downs, dad continued to grow our family as my sister Christine and I were born. And although I always remember him working hard, he always found time to take us on vacations and play with us….. To guide us.
Many of you remember the passing of my mother and the sadness that brought to us. Again my dad did his very best to try to keep normalcy in my family through those hard times. I know myself and those he cared for always felt the concern he showed at how we would take that loss, and I must thank him for that because it helped ease the blow.
Vito, no stranger to new beginnings DID go on to find love again and years later took Mary into his heart and married her. They stayed married for 23 years sharing love and happiness til his death just a few days ago. Again taking time out to help guide his new family and children Philip, Frank, and Vinny who I know he cared for deeply.
One thing about my dad is that he always knew how to make investments grow, and his family life was no different. The guiding and caring for the children he loved paid off. And BOY did our family grow. TWENTY beautiful grandchildren. TWENTY!!…All great kids. All filled with love. All taking different paths but I like to think, at least in some way, that Vito helped keep them on the right path.
Ya catching a pattern here????….. Him taking people into his heart?… Into his life and guiding them… Watching them… Taking responsibilty for them.
My sister and I were talking about the SO MANY people that have approached us these last few days, not only telling us how much they loved Vito but how he has helped them. Helped them start out in life, helped them with money, helped them with advice… Man did he offer great advice. As his son, my one regret in life is that I didn’t heed his advice more often *sighs* But I guess that is every son’s regret.
So..How has HIS life helped me shape mine??……Helped you shape yours??
Most of you here knew my dad.. He wasn’t the type to bounce you on his knee and say, (Deep voice) “Come here son and let me teach you how it is done”
It was more like him yelling something, like (Mimic him yelling) “ARE YOU CRAZY!!..WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING? DO YOU USE YOUR HEAD EVER??!!”
He would yell…That’s how he expressed himself. And we can laugh about it. We’ve always laughed about it. And the reason we could laugh is because in truth, it was never a “menacing” yell. It was always with concern..
I really don’t think anyone would consider him a “crabby” old man. In fact if ya really think about it. He was just the opposite. He was quick to laugh and quick to make you laugh. He LOVED a good joke. Was always telling them or sending them online. And he was good natured.
Ya know, I always considered my more endearing qualities..My gentleness, my fun-lovingness, my kindness, to be traits that came from my mother. But it wasn’t til I sat down to write this eulogy that I realized how many of the better parts of my personality come from my dad.
And here’s the kicker. It all came through example. THAT is how he taught me to be a man. That is how he taught all of us to lead a better life. Through example.
Working EVERY day to provide for his family. Taking time out for vacations or to take me fishing..Coming to our school plays. Spending time with neighbors and friends laughing. Helping others. And he NEVER complained. NEVER. He just took life in stride.
He also taught me ethics in life. Don’t get me wrong. He wasn’t “SAINT Vito”. I can still hear him yelling at me before job interviews.
(Mimic dad) “Whatever they ask you say YES…LIE..Just say you can do it”
But all in all I learned NOT to lie to those I love. I learned how not to show voilence to express myself. How not to take the favors or kindness from others for granted. How never to act as if I am better than anyone else.
You provided a life for your family…All of us.. filled with joy and love. You instilled the value of family in our hearts so deeply that there is a closeness in us, all of us, that can’t be broken. And that value will live on forever as we pass it on to our children. This is your legacy dad. Our family…YOUR family. And as a family we will mourn your death today, but you will live in our hearts forever..
You taught us SO MANY things… And now that the lessons have come to an end there is nothing left to do but to say Thank you.. Thank you dad for all you have taught us, given to us, showed us. Thank you for.. Well……. For just being my dad. I love you
